How to Deal with a Jealous Mother-in-Law: 12 Telltale Signs. You got married, so let the champagne flow!
But now you might have to deal with the numerous awful characteristics of a vengeful mother-in-law.
After a mother offers her prized child to you, she can get resentful of you because all the affection that they used to receive from their kid is now being given to you.
He’s at a stage in his life where he’s prepared to give someone else his unconditional love, therefore it’s not your fault her kid picked you.
There are many other possible causes for a mother-in-law’s jealousy of her new daughters-in-law, such as her sense of abandonment and loss, her perception that her son has ceased loving her, and many others. Last but not least, she might have felt frightened by you when he first started talking to her.
What are the signs that your mother-in-law is envious of you?
Check by becoming familiar with these envious mother-in-law symptoms.
12 Indices Your In-Law Mother Is Jealous
1.She disregards your boundaries, to start with.
If your mother-in-law is envious, she won’t ever respect your boundaries, and you’ll find yourself becoming angry over it all the time.
She still believes she sets the rules and is unconcerned with your viewpoint, needs, or desires.
She does this by talking over you, failing to listen to you, making plans for the family without consulting you, showing up at your door unannounced, and constantly violating your privacy.
2.he tries to sabotage your time with your husband and you.
How to Deal with a Jealous Mother-in-Law: 12 Telltale Signs. She’ll always desire to spend every minute of every day conversing with and being with your hubby.
You might think she’s attempting to distance herself from you and doesn’t value your time or your bond with her son.
Naturally, she will play the victim by claiming that she only wants to spend time with him.
But there is a line to be drawn here, and you can both see that she has crossed it.
3.She chats behind your back to your husband.
It’s not as if your boyfriend has divulged everything he discusses with his mother to you.
He ought to let you know if she is speaking negatively about you behind your back though, as that would be unfair to you.
In a discourse where you aren’t participating, you can’t speak. Additionally, she’s doing this on purpose to portray you in the worst possible light to your spouse.
Compared to how they feel about their mother, there is a different level of trust between you and your partner.
Since it’s common for people to gripe about their parents with their significant others, your relationship with your partner is typically stronger.
This can potentially cause a split between you and your mother-in-law, which might later develop into a very challenging issue.
4.She communicates with you via her son.
This is referred to as person triangulation.
She uses her kid to communicate with you because she doesn’t respect you enough to speak to you directly.
This may aggravate you while simultaneously driving you to act due to the petty nature of this action that emerges from triangulating, the same thing in response.
This puts stress on all three of you and could further distance you from her son.
5.She attempts to create a rift between you and her son.
How to Deal with a Jealous Mother-in-Law: 12 Telltale Signs. Some in-law mothers can be exceedingly poisonous.
They will do everything in their power to put as much space between you and her son as possible for you two to reach a deadlock and become discouraged.
6.She contrasts you with your husband.
A toxic mother-in-law will employ all of her cunning strategies to try to make you and her son enemies if she doesn’t like you or is envious of the time you spend with her son.
She might also attempt to cause conflict between the two of you, which might cause a rift between the two of you as well as between you and your mother-in-law.
7.She thwarts your plans, item
She can sabotage your plans or purposely disrupt them to put you to the test and see how committed you are to her.
This might become problematic if it happens regularly since it can cause you to become more distanced from both her and your husband.
8.She disregards you.
If your mother-in-law doesn’t like you and wants to make things difficult for you and your husband in your marriage, she can ignore you during family events, parties, and other occasions.
She will do whatever to avoid talking to you, ignore you at all times, and never give you the time of day.
9.She makes the environment stressful.
If she doesn’t like you, she will strive to make your life miserable and will stress you out to the point where you want to shout and destroy everything in your path.
She will make every effort to overwhelm you with her presence, her changes in plans, her numerous hassles, and her meddling in your marriage to keep you under constant stress.
10.She disparages you in front of other members of your family.
Whoever else there is in your partner’s family, whether he has great-great grandma, cousins, aunts, or brothers your mother-in-law, Trudie, who is almost completely deaf in both ears, will make sure to criticize you behind your back and try to convince the rest of the family to support her in everything.
She is purposefully dragging you through the muck so that your husband will stand by her side and not by yours.
11.She causes turmoil, making it impossible for you to function normally.
Because your mother-in-law constantly corrects you or says that everything you did wasn’t good enough, you feel as though you can never do anything correctly.
Or she obstructs your path wherever you go with her intrusive behavior.
She never approves of anything you do, and she doubles down by destroying your attempts to ever get anything done.
It makes sense that it’s making you crazy.
(Exactly what she desired!)
12.She berates you nonstop.
She constantly criticizes your employment or your attempts to join her family.
She will be unpleasant, critical, and passive-aggressive to your husband and other family members, and it will be difficult to put up with her constant negativity and resentment.
How to deal with an envious mother in-law
There are certain things you may attempt to do to try to reconcile things between you and her and try to manipulate her into liking you and possibly even not being so jealous anymore to tackle this poisonous scenario with your mother-in-law.
In the initial action, you should strive to comprehend her motivations and the source of her feelings, if at all possible.
Think about her actions and pinpoint her triggers and insecurities.
This should help you understand why she is so bitter and envious of you, and it may also help you figure out the best way to express your desire to attempt to mend your relationship.
So that she might come to love and trust you, you want to make an effort to build a strong relationship with her.
You must offer her a lot of the attention she craves to accomplish this, which will undoubtedly be challenging if she is actively trying to make your marriage toxic between you and your husband.
Keya Murthy, a clinical hypnotherapist and family expert, advises being direct, honest, and transparent while dealing with a resentful mother-in-law.
“Communication, not aggressiveness or flattery, is the way to win an opponent.
Discuss with her and occasionally include her on family outings.
Her feeling like an outsider around you can be avoided by integrating her into your family and treating her as you would any other member of your immediate family.
Make sure she understands that you respect her relationship with her son and that you are not attempting to interfere with it in any way.
“When you marry a person, you marry into the family. A mother-in-law who is envious is a weak woman.
Do what you can to keep your boundaries while ensuring that she feels safe.
Be friends, try your best, and disregard everything else.
You give her more power if you fret over her excessively, claims Murthy.
Your mother-in-law should become more at ease with you, stop feeling threatened, and start to see you as someone she no longer wants to exile but include in her family if you try all these things while also being open with your husband, avoiding conflict, and coming from a place of compassion and good intentions.
